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Top tips on being a successful (and happy!) granny-carerCreated by Charlotte in Age: At School, Age: Baby & Toddler, Age: On the way, Age: Pre-school, Being a Granny-carer
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مستشار استراتيجية الخيارات الثنائية At face value this is a wonderful arrangement that works for both parties – mum has piece of mind that the person responsible for their child has a vested interest and you have lots of precious time with your grandchild. Plus of course, the child benefits from an enriched upbringing.
انقر فوق مرجع However, this seemingly perfectly balanced set up can sometimes turn out less harmoniously than planned. Contemplating signing on the dotted line when you offer childcare for your children may seem a step too far, but according to a survey carried out by us, 78% of grandparents agreed that families should establish some kind of formal childcare arrangement when they are providing the childcare. Here are some of the grandparent’s reactions to the idea of drawing up a ‘contract’:“Consistency is important – but so is flexibility. There should be a few very basic ground rules, if only to forestall ‘playing off’ parents against grandparents, but with ‘wiggle room’ for learning that different people have different attitudes.”
“… we have had a long chat about it today and decided that we are going to impose some basic restrictions that may help us – the care must be in our home (theirs is chaotic and sends us scatty), and if it’s for several consecutive days we will have them sleep over or even rent a cottage at the seaside and go off for the duration – gives us at least a shot at consistency. Feel a bit better already!”
“ABSOLUTELY!!! [There should be ground rules established] We didn’t and now it’s a nightmare. It’s caused real problems and tension in the family and how I wish wish, wish that we had written up an agreement in advance.”
“It is only fair on the child that all the people that are caring for them are on the same page.”
http://blindtrack.co.uk/?komaxa=%D8%B3%D8%B9%D8%B1-%D8%A3%D9%88%D9%86%D8%B5%D8%A9-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%B0%D9%87%D8%A8-%D8%A7%D9%84%D9%8A%D9%88%D9%85-%D9%81%D9%8A-%D8%A7%D9%84%D8%B3%D8%B9%D9%88%D8%AF%D9%8A%D8%A9&652=2d So here are some of our top tips on how to avoid conflict:
- Few grandparents have the energy to offer full time care for five days a week. They may be keen to offer this, but those with experience say it’s physically overwhelming. Of course this depends on family circumstances as sometimes needs must.
- Make you communication well with each other – make it known if you need a break and be brave and say ‘no’ occasionally, especially for if your health is suffering.
- The issue of whether a grandparent should be paid for looking after their grandchildren leaves people divided. The important thing here it is to discuss it – if you feel you’ll be left out of pocket then it makes sense to ask for a contribution, particularly if the arrangement is for the foreseeable future.
- If you don’t feel comfortable receiving any payment then you could suggest that you are reimbursed for your expenses, such as travel or for the cost of any classes you might take your grandchild along to. All these small costs really add up over time.
- Most grandparents feel more comfortable looking after grandchildren in their own homes. This is because they feel that they are able to function better in their own surroundings. If your son or daughter pushes back on this point you can also remind them that it’s good for a child to spend time in different environments and therefore to get used to being comfortable somewhere other than home.
- It really helps if grandparents have all the equipment they need at their house to save lugging things backwards and forwards. Perhaps your son or daughter can help in the purchasing of these items, either in monetary form or by advising you on where best to buy everything. Second-hand products and eBay really come into their own here!
- Agree on an approach to your grandchildren’s eating and remember to ask what they like and dislike. We know how you love to give treats to your grandchildren, so find out if certain things are off limits at the start (e-colourings in certain sweets can do very strange things to children!)
- A consistent approach to discipline is obviously very important. You should be given the right to judge discipline in the context of that child’s day, so try and get mum to allow you this. It will make your life far easier, but do discuss appropriate punishments and rewards beforehand.
انتقل إلى موقعي The bottom line is that communication is key. Discussing and even formalising your arrangement on paper can really help bypass any friction that can easily rear it’s ugly head (often when you need it the least).
حسابات الفوركس المدارة By Charlotte